searching for freedom, decision making, fighting for life....

Is it a dream to stay at home, chillax and rot and dun have to worry anything much about not finishing your assignments and making your group members pissed at you and lecturers not giving you your marks to pass the term or getting hired/fired by your boss? Well, after being in that position for the past 2 months, I would say it was pretty enjoying dream at first but after a while it’s actually a nightmare….

The longer I stay at home doing house chores, being my family’s driver, and taking care of my grandma, I felt like I’m slowly being taken for my granted by my siblings. They dun have to worried about getting yelled at by my parents cause they are still schooling. But for me.. I’m different. It is obvious that if anything is not right in the house my parents and aunts will always come to me first…

Who likes getting scolding and being ordered everyday and every hour in the house when something is not right or to do something? I’m very sure you ppl out there would understand this. I know others may have bigger problems while mine is actually pretty small.. but a person can choose whether to live with that problem or to solve that problem and face a new problem and solve it again. Life is like a circle. When you solve something already, you will always be faced with a new challenge. And the challenge of my life which is still left unsolved IS GETTING A JOB AND EARNING MY OWN MONEY AND DUN HAVE TO WORRY WITH MY MOM CRAZY MOOD SWINGS.. I salute you yee lin for living up with a every-seconds-mood-swings mom. But that does not mean I hate my mom. She’s actually pretty fine when she’s really in the good mood.. when she’s not, be prepared cause the volcano is gonna erupt!! *KA-BOOM!!!!*

<P3@C3 0U+>

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Another thing to worry now is whether to let my grandmother to go through chemotherapy or not... It's actually a very painful thing to go through... we're (my family) are worried that she will go for the first session and would not go anymore cause of the pain that she had gone through during the first therapy.. what do you all think? should or should not send her for chemotherapy?? your answers/view matters to me.. thanks..